Ten Tips For Parents

Ten Tips For Parents

Written By: Shaun Smith- Absolute Mental Training

Parents often openly talk about what they “hope” their child can get out of their sport. This can range from playing at a very competitive level or my favourite “at least get a college scholarship.” I get that parents want what’s best for their children (I have two beautiful daughters who I would do anything for to see them succeed) but what sports parents do not realize is that talking about such high expectations may put undue pressure on a child to live up to their parental expectations

Statistically, the chances of your child being offered a college scholarship are slim to none. To state that you hope your child will get at least a college scholarship out of their sport puts a lot of pressure on your child to perform. Your child will not love and enjoy their sport but instead believe that they must be at their best to live up to your dreams. To make matters worse think about what will happen when your child doesn't get the recognition that you believe they deserve? Maybe they are one of the best athletes in their sport in your area and somehow they get missed by the scouts. Your child may develop feelings of inadequacy and may even want to drop out of their sport.

As we approach a new year I wanted to give each and every sport parent out there ten tips which we as parents should live by this coming year if want to allow sports to enrich our child’s lives. In my mind the following tips will help sports parents and coaches ensure that children experience positive feelings from engaging in sport and to help to create a physically active lifestyle that continues through adulthood.

Ten Tips For Sports Parents

1. Focus on your children's efforts and performances rather than the outcome of a competition: Teach your children that success means achieving their personal goals and performing at their best rather than winning a contest.
2. Help your children to set realistic goals that are measurable and attainable. Goals that are too vague or too difficult to achieve lead to a high dissatisfaction rate with their sport.
3. Make sure your children know that whether they win or lose, whether they play a lot or a little, you love them unconditionally. Give just as much praise for a loss as you do for a win.
4. Show respect for your children's coaching staff. If you're not happy with the coaching style or how they are handling things, discuss your concerns with the coach when you are alone with the coach. Don't coach your children from the sidelines.
5. Show support for your children's teams by attending games and cheering for all team members. Don't express criticism towards opponents or referees during competition.
6. Accept any limitations in your children's physical abilities. Not every child will be born with the uncanny ability of Michael Jordan to dunk a basketball or Wayne Gretzky to score 50 goals. Allow them to play within their skill level as they will have much more fun playing against a similar skill level.
7. Make sure your children are having fun. Ask your children if they are enjoying their participation in sports and want to continue or try something else? If they are not having fun try to find out why. If the problem cannot be solved try another sport.
8. Place your children in sports best suited to them rather than forcing your children into sports you prefer or that are most popular. If your child really enjoys playing badminton then let them play their sport. Nothing is worse than seeing children who hate their sport playing because their parents want them to.
9. Be careful not to relive your sport experiences exclusively through your children. Let them play for themselves, not for you.
10. Keep sport in perspective. Remember the purpose of sport for children is to create an opportunity for fun and growth. All the triumphs and heartaches that are inherent in sport for children can provide learning experiences and lessons that help pave the road to adulthood.

I would like to take this time to take a moment and thank all of you for taking the time to read my articles and wish everyone the best in 2012! To do this I have also provided you with some great offers which I will continue until the new year for all the Absolute Mental Training blog readers. To see what offers are in store please take a look at www.absolutementaltraining.com

Shaun Smith is the founder of Absolute Mental Training and provides The Goalie Guild with a weekly column that is posted every Tuesday. If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to email him at ssmith@absolutementaltraining.com!